The day has come

It is the most difficult part of owning a creature, particularly dogs.

To decide that your dog is too sick and you must make a merciful choice of euthanasia, in theory seems like a no brainer. However, it is full of emotions. You spend a decade with a dog as your pal, who loves you unconditionally and is forever happy to see you regardless of what is going on in the world, and never holds a grudge when you take them to the vet for a shot! This creature that will make your day by making you feel like you are the center of the world.  My sensible and adult brain says of course, we cannot make her suffer. My emotional side is thinking about how much my heart will ache when she is gone!

I knew this day would come. I just was not really ready for it.  My shadow, my little garden dog, Anthem, is preparing to go to Rainbow ridge.  We went to the vet because her allergies or skin rash was worsening. We went got a new antibiotic and the rash cleared up nicely. The vet said she could gain a few pounds. I reminded him we were trying to keep her on the lighter side due to her dysplasia. She started to breathe heavy three days ago. We thought it was her response to pain so we upped the tramadol.

It was not making her better so we went to the vet and they examined her. After x rays, we found there was fluid in her lungs… and everywhere else. Once the vet drained her lungs, we could see her heart was enlarged. This girl is a solid ten years of age. She is not healthy. When I saw the size of her heart I realized that regardless of no more fluid in the lungs, there were bigger problems. We discussed quality of life issues with the vet and she sent us home.

She told us to watch her for signs such as trouble breathing, or any type of stress and discomfort.

Anthem was a little loopy from the meds. She slept well, she laid in from of Jack’s crate. But as the day went on, her breathing became more labored.

I just had the image of the grapefruit sized heart in her chest and I knew , I had to act like a grown up and make an unselfish decision about Anthem’s quality of life.

The kids took pictures with her and took little samples of  her fur ( Weird I know!!!).

Then they all hugged her goodbye.

The journey to Rainbow Bridge for Anthem has begun.

Me and my girl…( my eyes red from crying in anticipation of the last ride to the vet.)

Her buddy , Jack, keeps looking out the front door for her.  ( At least that is what I think he is doing).

 

Rainbow Bridge poem:

 

 

Rest easy Anthem, hope you see Victor there.